Peace on Earth

It's been a very hard couple of months for our little family. We've struggled on many fronts. With no money (the ex stopped making any support payments), no lawyer (yes, they do expect paid, afterall), and no sleep, I began to panic. How would I feed the children? How can we keep the house warm and the lights on? How can I fight this huge legal battle with no help, and no money to GET help??? What would I do for the holidays so the children didn't feel hurt?

When all else fails, get on your knees, Girl! I've been able to find some Peace. I can feed my family because I have food storage and there are those that will help with what I can't store. These great friends have been by me for years...they are so sweet and dear! They have been a huge blessing to me. There are those that can explain law to me so I can do some things myself until I can get money to get a lawyer (that will require the ex to part with money, so I don't see that happening...I know, I know..."bitter ex wife"...yeah, imagine that). They are there to give me the joke of the day, share a fun movie/story with us, or just here to laugh and break up the darkness in my little brain. They lift me, and my children and help us to find comfort. They keep us "steadfast and immovable". That's what friends are...little angels with BIG hearts! PEACEMAKERS. ;)

It began to change a little yesterday. It was Thanksgiving. We wrote down on paper all that we were thankful for, and cut each item up (and folded it for privacy) and put it in a jar on the table. It was a nice way for them to put their "hearts out there" without having to say it out loud (which was helpful to some of the sick ones here who can't really talk without coughing!). We ate well...food storage---yahoo! I have never realized how much of Thanksgiving is canned goods! Are you grinning, too? I had everything but the marshmallows. It was great. We were feeling thankful and happy (and sleepy).

Later, we decided to dig through all the drawers, shelves, old jackets, cabinets, and toy room clutter for change...little coins., lost piggy banks, hidden stashes. We found almost $64.00 worth! It was a fun way to explore the little nooks of our home (and a way to find the drawers that need the most attention NOW). We then decided what to do with that money. Their faces lit up as they thought of the good they could do with those little, tiny, coins. Ahhhh...the Spirit was working with us.

We toyed with how to use it. It was debated, discussed, and finally, part of the answer came last night. I was dinking around checking out the famous "Black Friday" ads after the children went to bed. (A girl can dream!) Walmart was having a sale on Christmas trees! So, we used a little part of our coins to get a Christmas tree (getting up at 4:30am...uuggh). And I learned something in the process...Walmart takes rolled coins! Tree found, we came home and went back to bed. Thankful for blankets.

That added to the spirit of the home's holiday atmosphere. The rest of the coins will be used for good deeds. The children will decide as the days go on how to use what they found. The true Spirit of Christmas will be found this year, I'm sure! Despite the current challenges, I have much to be thankful for. Mostly, those cute little faces (some taller than me) that trust me, and love me, and work with me. They each are great. And together, we're unbeatable!

I was putting the little ones to bed tonight. We had full tummies (thankful to the Prophet for that food storage encouragement), a glowing Christmas tree that we'll decorate tomorrow as we turn on our Christmas songs (hello, Playlist!), and the warmth and crackle of a fire in the fireplace. The baby was pattering his little feet upstairs holding onto his "baby" stuffed animal, eager to snuggle into bed for stories. One of the children was snoring (he's sick), but that means he found some peace for the night, too. And the sounds of children snuggling into their beds. That peace and reassurance of motherhood. It is it's own blessing.

I found some Peace in this storm in my life. It's just in the rythm of the days and nights here. It's in the whispering of the children as they go to bed. It's in the routine. It's in the scriptures, prayers, and blessings from obedience. But, that's what was the Peace...the normalicy of the night.